so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
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