Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
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