What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Randomize
