Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
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