and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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