Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
