I woke up at 7am naked in my bathtub with the shower running. My apartment was so full of steam that my ceiling was dripping. Who thought it would be okay for me to get my own place, anyway?
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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