He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
Randomize
