The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize
