The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
