a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
My freaking DENTIST just commented on my hickies. Through the novacaine I managed to mumble 'It was my birthday' and she smiled knowingly.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
You sending me our unborn, unfertilized babies' names is not what I envisioned when you said you'd "drunk text me later".
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
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