how hairy? two words: wookie tits
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
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