carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
I accidentally asked my mom for a blowjob because 'mom' and 'molly' are next to each other in my address book.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
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