I can tuck mytits in my pants
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
Randomize
