What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
