Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
Randomize
