Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
My vagina is very pro this idea
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
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