I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
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