Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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