Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Randomize
