yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
Randomize
