I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize
