Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize
