You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
