those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
Randomize
