just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize
