Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
Randomize
