69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
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