Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
I love you. Go after that dick
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
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