So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
