their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
Randomize
