Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Randomize
