the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
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