I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Randomize
