doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
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