And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Randomize
