i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
Randomize
