You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
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