i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
Randomize
