If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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