The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
