On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
Randomize
