Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
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