Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
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