I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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