I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
