idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
These tits shall not be calmed
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
Randomize
