last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
Randomize
