I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
Randomize
