well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
Randomize
